Not even MSNBC is buying Nancy Pelosi’s rambling tale of magic and heroism. You know, the one that goes:
1. The Bush administration never told us they were waterboarding, and we never would have approve of it.
2. OK, the Bush administration *did* sort of tell us they were *going to use* waterboarding, but I didn’t really believe they would do it.
3. OK, the Bush administration did tell us they were actually using waterboarding, but I strenuously objected… in secret letters… that must have gotten lost in the mail, somehow…
4. We need a truth commission to get to the bottom of this… then again, maybe that’s a bad idea.
Apparently, an aide had to hustle the old bat out of the press conference to try to limit the damage she was doing to herself. But by then, it was too late.
Now, if Granny Rictus Botox were to tell the truth, I think it would go something like this:
Reporter: Madame Speaker, your explanation of your knowledge of waterboarding is like a sale on sh-t flavored popsicles… nobody’s buying it. So, why not tell us the truth.
Pelosi: OK, here’s the truth. Yes, we were all fully briefed on the enhanced interrogation techniques being used on a small number of high-valued prisoners. We realize that the Bush administration only resorted to these measures to protect American lives, and we gave our tacit approval. That was in 2002-2003.
But then in 2005-2006, we realized there had been a shift in public opinion and we could get a lot of political mileage if we teamed up with Move-On and George Soros and started screaming about torture and depicting Bush as the Greatest Monster since Vlad the Impaler. We knew the mainstream media could be relied upon to repeat and promote the narrative most favorable to us Democrats — which they totally did. And we rode that horse right back to power. We really didn’t give a hot damn about anything else, and we figured we could sweep it under the rug once we got in.
So, yeah, I approved of enhanced interrogation when I thought it was politically advantageous to do so, and I screeched about “torture” when it was politically advantageous to do so? I’m a liberal Democrat, what kind of ethics did you expect from me?
I won’t hold my breath waiting for the old hag to admit the truth.